COFFEE!
by TweakerWolf
Summary: Requested drabble, Stiles gets hyped up on coffee and annoys Derek!


Request: Character A is hyped up on coffee and pesters Character B with Stiles and Derek

I know that a lot of people say caffeine has the opposite affect on people with ADHD and that it actually calms them down... but for the sake of being ultra hilarious (and the fact those were the two characters that specifically requested), we're going to casually ignore that fact and just roll with it.

* * *

Derek jumped as the loft door was flung open all of a sudden; he'd been totally engrossed in the novel he was reading and hadn't heard the thundering footsteps coming this way.

"Derek! Ohmygod Derek!"

"Stiles? What the hell are you doing here at 7 in the morning on a Saturday, aren't you supposed to be sleeping in?" Derek called out, eyes wide.

"No, it's fine, I just figured something out!"

"Please don't yell…"

Stiles ran right up to Derek, flopping onto the couch next to him, eyes wide, "So I was rereading Harry Potter and in the one scene, where Aunt Petunia mentions what Dementors are, and then Uncle Vernon looks at her funny- the awful boy she was referring to was Snape! This whole time I was like Harry and just assumed she was talking about James!"

"What?"

"Haven't you… read the books yet? You promised that you would!" Stiles cried out, standing up and staring at Derek in total disbelief.

Derek rolled his eyes, "I'm on the second book… I'm not that big into Human versions of fantasy, I kinda grew up with it you know? They aren't bad though… But I haven't reached the point you're talking about at all."

"Oh, well so in the fifth book-"

"No! No spoilers! I might not be reading through them that fast but I am planning on finishing them so don't say any more!"

"Oh my god you're so lame! I need someone to talk to about all of this stuff!" Stiles pouted.

"Go tell Scott then."

"He isn't awake! I called him- you know what he did? As soon as he found out I was talking about Harry Potter and not something quote-unquote important, he hung up on me!"

Derek sighed, "In his defense, you aren't normally awake until 1 in the afternoon on Saturdays. Seriously, why are you awake?"

"I got up with Dad to talk to him about something before he went to work, and there was some coffee left so I had some…" Stiles confessed.

"Oh god…"

"Shut up, it's not that bad!"

"Stiles, you are pacing around the coffee table, have been ever since you got off the couch to stare at me. AND you haven't stopped staring at me… it's kinda creepy how you're pacing around the table but staring at me the whole time, just stop!" Derek said, sticking his foot out to impede the teen's movements.

"Well you won't let me talk to you about Harry Potter, Scott turned off his phone and-"

"How many times did you call him?"

Stiles paused for the briefest of seconds before blatantly stepping over Derek's leg, "Well he answered the first time and that was when he hung up and I called him 7 more times before he turned his phone off."

"Of course he turned off his phone, he's acting like a normal teen that wants to sleep in on the weekend," Derek scoffed.

"Let's go do something! You like to run right? I mean, normally I hate running but my legs won't stop moving, just one foot in front of the other, you know? So show me some of the old trails you used to take when you lived at the house-"

"Stiles, no more coffee."

The teen pouted, coming over to drastically shake Derek's arm, "Run with meeeeeeeeEEEEEE!"

"I have a better idea!" Derek stood up and dragged Stiles over to a chair in the kitchen, motioning for him to stay there. Then he disappeared upstairs and came back down with a length of rope, tying him to the chair. "Escape. That should keep you busy!"

Stiles rolled his eyes, "I've played this game before, it's not that hard! Let's see what kind of knot you used…"

Derek left him to mumble to himself and went back to his book. He got maybe a page into it before he heard a clunking noise. "Stiles, no tipping over the chair, that's cheating. If you break it you're buying me another one!" he called over his shoulder. Then the clunking got louder and Derek sighed, turning to face the kitchen, "No tipping the-" he was cut off midsentence as he saw Stiles rocking the chair from left to right, effectively walking it into the living room.

"I was bored in there, so I figured I'd come in here and chat with you while I'm working on getting loose," Stiles told him.

Derek just watched as Stiles navigated the chair around the couch and around the coffee table so he could face Derek.

"Okay, so, I mean, you won't let me talk to you about Harry Potter, I get that. What about Game of Thrones though? I mean you aren't even interested in that series right? Can I just… vent to you about… damn, you tightened these knots _really_ well. Hope my fingers don't get too raw trying to undo them. Anyways, can I vent to you about the latest season?"

"No."

"Why not?!"

"I'm trying to read!"

"Hey, why don't you go get Chamber of Secrets and I'll like read it aloud to you while I sit here! I'm sure I could read it faster than you and I'm like an expert at storytelling, I do voices and everything!"

Derek suddenly felt like crying in frustration, he couldn't even call Scott to come and rescue him from this hyper brat right now because his phone was off! Was there any way to shut him up? Sure, he could use duct tape but that felt a little too mean, even for Stiles in coffee-mode. "You aren't reading Harry Potter to me, I can read it on my own thanks."

"Then at least let me vent about the horrible mistreatment of the Starks!"

"Who?"

Stiles rolled his eyes, "In Game of Thrones! George R. R. Martin like seriously hates them for some reason! I don't get it!"

The teen rambled on for about 5 minutes about all the unfairness about characters that Derek didn't even try to keep straight. Then Derek had had enough, getting up and going into the kitchen, ignoring Stiles's questions about where he was going. Immediately though the teen started clunking his way back into the kitchen but Derek ignored him. Instead he grabbed a spoon and a jar of peanut butter, scooping out a huge amount. When Stiles finally worked his way into the kitchen and opened his mouth to say something, Derek stuffed the spoon in there.

"MMmmm p'nt 'utr" Stiles sputtered out around the sticky substance. "So 'ny wys, 'ike I ws ayin' 'ed 'ark dint 'e'erve wht tat 'sshle 'offrey did-"

Derek looked on dumbfounded as Stiles just continued to talk around the huge glob of peanut butter in his mouth… he couldn't make out half the words he was saying but that didn't seem to deter him at all. Then when Stiles actually finished what was in his mouth, he gestured to the spoon again with his chin and opened his mouth, signaling for more. Derek just sighed in resignation and gave him another spoonful then went back into the living room, Stiles easily following him in the chair. The next thirty minutes went the same way, Derek just sitting on the couch, watching Stiles talk and munch on peanut butter, occasionally asking for more. Then he finally managed to free himself, standing triumphantly.

"Now what?" he asked, still brimming with energy.

"Now I'm driving you to the station so your father will learn that he is to never, ever, leave coffee in the pot at home ever again! Let's go annoy your dad, shall we?"

"Oh boy! I love going to the station! They always try and hide the current case files from me, but I have really sneaky fingers and I steal them and read them anyways!" Stile yelled, easily following Derek back out the loft door.


End file.
